Let's Get Ready To Royal Rumble!

Monday, January 30, 2017

I think I've probably mentioned this at some point, but Tom is really into wrestling. I, on the other hand, hate it, but what I do like is that occasionally, we have guests over for the various PPV shows. I enjoy entertaining, so this is the part of wrestling that speaks my language.

Royal Rumble logo from wwe.com
Yesterday was the Royal Rumble, and we had some friends coming over from Indy to watch with us. So what did I do? Come up with a punny themed menu to go along with the show, of course!

My inspiration came from some of the wrestlers themselves. It all started last week, while Tom was watching a match with a wrestler named Neville; it suddenly occurred to me that Nevilled eggs would be a hilarious thing to serve at a wrestling get-together, and thus, a plot was hatched (that pun actually wasn't intended, but I'm leaving it in there anyway, because now I can't stop laughing at how ridiculous it is).

Normally, I would have decorated, or at least done some fancier tags for the food, but cleaning the house took long enough, and at that point, I was just happy to have a clean house and food prepared. I'm (slowly) learning to be a bit more chill about things like that.

***Also, a heads up -- the pictures in this post are kind of terrible. The light bulbs in the dining room had all burnt out, and we still need to go get some, so we just pulled one out of our bedroom, and it wasn't exactly ideal lighting for photographs***

So, with that embarrassing note out of the way, our menu for the evening was as follows:

The Fizz

The Fizz was, simply, soda, named in honor of The Miz. This was Tom's contribution to the menu, other than the MULTIPLE references to flan he kept trying to make, to which I had to say

Cesaro Salad

Cesaro salad came to me almost as quickly as Nevilled eggs did. It just made sense -- Cesaro (a Swiss wrestler) and Caesar are too similar to not jump on that.

Nevilled Eggs

seriously, they look SO terrible

The only thing I ever saw my beloved grandma actually cook was deviled eggs. She showed me how she did it once, but I was eight, and don't really remember a lot other than Miracle Whip and mustard. It turns out, that's pretty much all she used, plus a dusting of paprika (I asked my mom, since I never got the recipe from my grandma before she died), so I tried my best to recreate them. They definitely weren't as good as my grandma's (hers were the BEST), but they weren't bad. However, I was HORRIBLE at peeling them. I tried doing it underwater, and I still took almost all of the white off (I think they needed to cook a few more minutes), so they were pretty hideous deviled eggs that fell apart pretty easily. But Tom said that since Neville's nickname is "The Man That Gravity Forgot", they were kind of appropriate.

Broccoli-snar and Other Assorted Veggies

What's a spread without some crudité? And obviously, the easiest way to make a vegetable-wrestler pun is to combine broccoli and Brock Lesnar. Well, it may have been obvious to me because I sat next to a kid named Brock at lunch every day from 1st grade to 5th grade (we sat alphabetically by class, and we were always in the same class), and I called him Broccoli. In hindsight, that was kind of crappy of me, but he would call me Tomato in response because I have such ruddy cheeks, so it all kind of worked out.

World Heavyweight Championchips with A.J.-Style French Onion Dip and Cena Salsa

Okay, so the "A.J.-Style French Onion Dip" is a bit of a stretch, but with A.J. Styles and John Cena fighting for the World Heavyweight Championship, it would have been weird to not include him in some way with the chips. Plus I needed a pun for the dip. You can't just not have dip. We had wavy potato chips (the best for dipping, in my opinion) with French onion dip, and tortilla chips with salsa. The potato chips were more popular.

Side note: the only spelling word I misspelled in third grade was championship...because I thought it was championchip. Oh, if only Mrs. Smith could see me now...


I was stumped for something more substantial, but then I remembered Goldberg was fighting (which is kind of weird, because everything I knew about wrestling pre-Tom, I knew from some boys in my 6th grade class who were obsessed with Goldberg and Stone Cold Steve Austin; it's strange that all these years later, he's back and involved in a massive feud). Goldbergers were the obvious choice. I topped them with sharp white cheddar and served them with lettuce, tomato, and condiments. Tom lamented at the last minute that we hadn't gotten kosher beef since Goldberg is Jewish, so I grabbed the kosher pickles from the fridge.

Charlotte Royale

Dessert ended up being kind of obvious too. The big women's match was between Charlotte and Bayley, so making a charlotte seemed appropriate. I knew I had a recipe for an apple charlotte somewhere, but I had never actually made one. I started googling charlottes to see what different kinds could be made, and I came across the charlotte royale, a custard-filled cake made from sliced swiss rolls. With Charlotte fighting in the Royal Rumble, there just weren't any other options. It was kismet.

Apparently, charlotte royale is also called "brain cake", which is appropriate. I do think it would have looked more impressive had I used a deeper bowl though.

The Elusive Zebra Jason Ayers Cakes

One of our friends is a referee, so we wanted to do something related to him because we thought it would be funny, but we were having trouble finding a food to fit his name. Since another term for a ref is "zebra", we ended up just grabbing a box of Zebra Cakes and calling it a day. It worked, and his wife was amused.

We had a lot of fun throwing this zany meal together, and it actually kind of has me looking forward to Wrestlemania. I can't wait to see what we come up with next!

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